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Marijuana & Morphine... My Life in a Pill Bottle

Chronic pain & PTSD... 'Scuse me while I kiss the sky!

My life. Pills, buds, pipes & bongs.

When I was just 8 years old, growing up in upstate NY, I started smoking cigarettes and pot. All through High School, and in '79, I joined the Army, which, at the time was full of pot smokers, and life in the 82d Airborne was the "high life"! After discharge, I spent 30 years in restaurants and assorted jobs... construction, landscaping, stucco, convenience store, etc. I've always been a multi-tasker, and chronic overworker; sometimes pulling shifts in three different jobs in a 24 hour period. And all through the years, I was a drummer, RUSH-style, Neil Peart, my drum-god! During all the time in the Airborne, I suffered a melee of injuries to my body, including... 4 major concussions, 3 lesser concussions, many cases of whiplash to the neck, dislocations, crushed bones, and a gamut on injurious happenings to my body. Between the late 80s and the turn of the millennia, I smoked intermittently. Cigarettes, every day, up to two and a half packs a day, and I smoked weed as I ran across friends who smoked, but I was always the lightweight in the party. I got high easily, and I've always enjoyed marijuana. Fast-forward to 10 years ago. 

I moved back to Tucson, AZ in 2007 to work for my sister's Real Estate company. NEVER WORK FOR FAMILY! My sister was a screamer, especially when it came to family... the office girls were treated sweetly, and I was treated as a wall to my sister, who's anger made me want to drink, and I did! Luckily for me, I rented a house to the woman to whom I am now married since 5/3/08, and she got me to quit working for my sister, as she heard the verbal abuse. I then started trying other jobs that required a lot of energy. Stocking magazines in grocery stores was my last job in '09, but, my rotator cuffs were shot! From injuries sustained through the years, and I was also a drummer too for 30+ years. But, my body literally began disintegrating, and one day of throwing heavy magazine totes, I had to recoup for days! In late 2010, I started running through Drs until I ended up in this one medical office. Dr J, I'll call him, was old, and I'd answer a question, and as I tried to add to the story I'm telling him, he'd shush me, and write... and he wrote volumes from one question, and I finally told him that he's not helping, and I've only got 20 minutes to tell a 40 year story! He shuffled me off to Dr. Rick, my present doc. That was what really changed my life. Over the next two years, Dr. Rick and I slowly ran through all possible combinations of painkillers, starting with Tramadol, which I never felt! For a year, I was on 10/20mg hydrocodone daily, and each pill came with 325mg of Acetaminophen! I was afraid for my liver, and at this time my wife & I, and the Dr. settled on oxycontin, but, at the same time, I was on psych meds for my SSDI, and I think she was experimenting with me! As my Doc gave me the oxy, and the psychiatrist was throwing handfuls of clonopin, venlafaxine, and a few other pills in my daily cocktail! I blacked out at the wheel, the same day I was going to the Docs to switch off the psych meds, and get my morphine sulfate along with medical cannabis. What a coincidence, huh?

Now! After dropping the psychiatrist, Doc Rick started me on morphine sulfate, 210mg daily, along with Seroquel (Quetiapine), Valium, and Amytriptaline for bedtime, AND medical cannabis. After three years of the same dose, I've just gotten an extra 30mg immediate release morphine tab per day, coming to 240mg. And I've promised to not ask for an increase in the morphine for another three years  But! I'm no longer afraid for my liver, and almost 6 years now I've been smoking weed regularly, every day, along with everything else listed above. So, I'm now taking the morph, 240mg daily, Seroquel, up to 350mg, depending on pain levels, and if I'm using it with the amitriptyline to get to sleep, 10mg Valium, (doesn't touch me, and I get 30 pills for three months, so I save up to take 3 to 4), as I'm very deep in chronic and intractable pain daily, but I don't deviate from my morphine schedule, except to save a 30mg immediate release tab once in a while, and I've built up a little supply in case Walgreens runs out of something. But that's besides the point. I now never feel anything from the morphine except a drop off in my pain #'s. And even the more potent marijuana strains today don't affect me like the lesser THC content weed from the 70s did. Todays cannabis is 17.5 times stronger than 70s weed. As for my liver enzymes, the doc was afraid, but I keep testing clean! Wow! What did it? Cannabis....

I've researched hard on all of my medications through the years, and I may have omitted it above, but part of my Army time was also as a medic. Combat surgery was my specialty, and I was a member of a small, special operations group that I can't discuss, sorry... but I took to learning medicine, and I'm self-taught in many things, drums, guitar, bass, and I have been taking free college courses to occupy my mind, and I failed to tell ya that I have a "special" mind. Not "special" as brain damage, but I'm empathic, even for Facebook friends whom I've never met! I feel people's pain long distance! Hard to believe, but I'm a spiritual atheist, and I believe in the hidden powers of the universe. I've got a steel trap mind, and I remember everything I've ever been taught, and my brain is a mish-mosh of eidetic, and photographic memories combined! Believe it! That's what's helped me to cope through my years of pain. I'm able to meditate, Buddhist style, and I've got multiple martial arts belts, but I can't workout anymore, and do light T'ai Chi in the mornings to keep the blood moving and not seize up.

But, cannabis, morphine, and pain is my target here... Through my research of everything I take, I've been discovering things... amazing things about cannabis, and I've really been researching hard now, as I'm finding more and more positives to cannabis, and I've found that the entire 80 years of marijuana prohibition was based on a lie, from the very first "drug-czar," Harry Anslinger, who blamed the "marihuana epidemic" on the African-Americans and Mexicans! And Reefer Madness was just plain old, BS propaganda. I've discovered that cannabis and the resulting cannabinoids enter our bodies, and we have a system or receptors all over our bodies called the endogenous cannabinoid system, or ECS. CB-1 receptors in the brain, and central nervous system are affected by weed, THC receptors give you the high from the delta-9 Tetrahydrocannabinol, but THC does so much more than give us a buzz! CB-2 receptors are completely covering our immune systems, and promotes homeostasis at every level of biological life! So! Pain....

I have: fibromyalgia, degenerative disc disease, chronic pain syndrome, chronic regional pain simplex, chronic spondylosis (where my discs protrude and press on my spinal cord), spinal cord stenosis, (bone growths occluding the neural foramen where the nerves pass out through the vertebrae), osteoarthritis, maybe heading for rheumatoid arthritis too! And add PTSD as the cherry on top of the shit-sundae I eat daily! I've been in my Dr.'s office in 10/10 pain. After my blackout, I turned in my drivers license, and living at the ass-end of nowhere, which we love, I'm cut off from the rest of the world, except for Dr.'s appointments and SSDI check cashing and dispensary trip. I'm a happy recluse, as I cannot function well in a public setting without utilizing my MMJ vape-pen, an Indica THC patch, and emergency pills in my pocket, as well as hard candies that contain cannabis. Without all of that, I can't stand to be out of the house, and most of my days are spent in repose with our dog and cat, and my lovely wife, Debbie is home half the time. I sleep 5 to 6 hours nightly, and I usually take multiple naps throughout the day, equalling almost 15 hours of sleep per day! Just riding in the car! I've got a super stiff neck pillow of memory foam that I wear around my neck in the car. And I spend most trips pressed hard against my seat back, and the pillow to help with the "g-force induced neck hangover," I call it, where the g-forces of curves, stops, anything sudden can throw my neck out of joint. Actually discs slipping around and pressing on my spinal column. So, I'm always in pain, and just recently Doc Rick suggested a pain specialist, because I told him my daily pain levels with my current pharmacopoeia are in the 4/5 range, bottom! No lower! Last year I had a "fibro-flare," an exacerbation of all of my symptoms causing me to shiver in the Arizona sun, and inside with the air conditioning I had hot flashes to rival most women's menopause! But I told him it's a waste of my wife's time to rush home and get me to the specialist in a timely manner. Debbie's work entails lab stuff that she cannot just drop for taking me anywhere. Plus the fact that I told Doc that I'm totally used to my pains, and a 4/5 bottom out is the best I can hope for. And I've already seen the top doctors for the Arizona sports teams, and they all said that any Dr. who says, "let's cut ya open and see IF we can fix you," run fast... run far... And I never feel the morphine either! And I barely get a buzz from the most potent weed strains! Just a drop off in pain #'s. So, Doc realizes after I told him that last year, I went through a 7 month long flare! 7/8 pain, minimum, for seven months! Imagine that! And I lived! Hip-hip-Hooray! So, back to the point...

Cannabis, cannabinoids, phytocannabinoids; 480 constituents to the marijuana plant, and hemp-based CBD, cannabidiol medicine that is legal for mail order in all 50 states! I've studied and studied, and I am now the proud owner of nine (9) pages/groups on Facebook! I've got Rick's Medical Marijuana Group, Rick's Pain Group, Poetry For Everyone, Patriot-up for Donald Trump America, my homepage wall, and Cannabis Education For Everyone; then I've got Marizonarick's Pain Blog, Marizonarick's Video Log, and I have a small, private group of super close friends that I started to meet after I came back to Facebook after a 3 year hiatus. I was learning how to deal with the pain and avoided everyone, even Facebook. 

Now! As for Facebook... all of my pages, groups and blogs are all about my pains, other folks pain, and I discuss medical marijuana on all pages, because that's what has had the largest impact on my personal health. In my studies, I've discovered that my liver enzymes keep coming out clean, despite the morphine, which SHOULD show some affects, but don't. This piqued my interest in learning everything possible about the Cannabacaea family. Facebook and Twitter and Instagram have become my lifelines to the rest of the world, and the group Cannabis Education For Everyone, I just built it this Tuesday and I have many folks stopping in to learn the facts and truths about medicinal cannabis and hemp based cannabidiol medicines. I have a video series called "Marijuana: (and secondary title describing the video)", on a YouTube channel at [email protected] and I've just finished video #99! Yes, my next cannabis video will be my 100th!! I shoot my vids early as possible in the mornings, so I can sleep in after the upload starts. Now, I cannot even shower and shave without feeling like I've been run through the wringer, and it takes a lot of my reserve energy to just sit and talk to my tablet for an hour or so. All of my videos started from Facebook posts, but they limit you to 30 minutes at a post, so I went to YouTube and I'm averaging one hour to two hours of each shoot, and I show people that I'm in pain....you can see it in my eyes! Friends across the globe tell me they can see my pain, and that's a big help. It's semi ironic that the best people I've met on Facebook are chronic pain patients, but they really are the best friends. In the abstract, my sister was posting crap on Facebook saying things like quit whining, the pussy-train is leaving the station, and stop your pissing and moaning! My friends said, "Is that your family?" To which I replied, yes, and I blocked my own sister. She's still a screamer, and a money-grubbing bitch who was disrespectful to my friends, and deserved to be blocked. She even pissed off Debbie, who's very hard to anger! Mom says I should mend the fence, but I told Mom, look! I gave her every opportunity to apologize to ME for stealing a few of my commissions, and she was paying me a shit wage and wanted me to drop my life, and move in at my parents house, where they share 12 acres with my folks. Dad died last October, and it's just Mom and Sister, and they live 5 miles away, but I refuse to kiss up to my sister... she needs to apologize to me, I told Mom. Period. We've never got along, and turns out she was trying to turn me into an indentured servant who'd do whatever her whim may be, but I'm a very independent thinker, and I'll not compromise my principals for her, who has no real morals or principals herself, she's just a money hungry bitch. Well, enough about her....back to cannabis, and Facebook. 

So, I've got hundreds of friends, mostly chronic pain patients who are the best friends I've ever had besides Debbie, who is wife #4 for me, and I'm her one and only. We've already been married longer than all three previous marriages added together! She's extremely supportive of me, and I do all I can to keep the house clean without injuring myself, sometimes I do too much, and suffer, but she never says "told ya so!" Cannabis helps.

Now, let's get deep into the cannabis issue....

I study, and study, and I put my findings into my video stories. I medicate on air, and use myself as a guinea pig experiment for cannabis. Folks can watch the pain leave my eyes! So, why do I come out clean for my liver enzymes when I'm on such high doses of morphine sulfate? Because, I've discovered that cannabis does the most amazing things to our bodies! The human endo-cannabinoid system is a natural system of specific receptors in our bodies, down to the sub-cellular level! We humans have only occupied the earth for a short time compared to the age of the planet, and cannabis and hemp were here millions of years before us! Herbivore dinosaurs probably ate both crops wild. We've evolved through the millennia to have this internal system for cannabinoids, and, believe it or not, cannabinoids promote health and homeostasis throughout our systems. At every level of biologic life! All vertebrates, even sub-microscopic sea squires, and nematodes have an ECS! This is a direct indication that cannabinoids belong in our body. We even create our own endo-cannabinoids internally! Upon embryonic implantation, moms' bodies release cannabinoids, naturally, to kick-start the baby's ECS, and after birth, mom's milk contains cannabinoids to keep the baby hungry and calm. And Mom did NOT ingest any exogenous cannabinoids, which are the Cannabacaea family. Once I learned this, I've become an activist for the complete legalization of medicinal cannabis. All of my videos discuss this system and its actions on our internal organs and systems.

And, cannabinoids, and cannabis itself, is actually non-addictive, but not only that! It's ANTI-addiction, and they've begun to utilize cannabis in place of methadone to wean addicts clean! Thus, my liver is being saved from damage by my opiates therapy through the awakening of, and daily use of my endo-cannabinoid system! Truth and facts, people! I'm going to shoot video 100 next week, and I'll be restarting reading from my notebook where I've written everything about cannabis therapy, and it's my reference book for my videos. More than 150 pages of facts that shows that the prohibition of marijuana has been the gravest disservice our country could've ever done! We require cannabinoids at every stage of life, and all of the negative hype is just so much bullshit, driven by people like Jeff Sessions, the latest "drug-czar." I'm trying to get people past the limiting thought patterns that our government has been lying to us since 1937! In 1973, the Nixon administration spent a few million to find the bad stuff on cannabis. But, they didn't expect to find that cannabis and cannabinoids kill cancers! Nixon buried the info, and the government secretly patented it! Reagan and Bush administration tried to have this evidence destroyed! Marinol, dronabinol, is big Pharma's answer. But it only helps the nausea and appetite for cancer patients. Real cannabinoids from the plant itself, are the cure for cancers! At least 34 proven cancer cures, and where big Pharma pushes chemotherapy and radiation therapy on cancer patients, knowingly knowing that it's doing worse, and most chemo/radiation actually spurs the growth of tumors! So, if you get any type of cancer, demand medicinal cannabis! I tell folks all the time to use my videos, and show them to their doctors, and if legal, get weed! If you cannot get it in your state, many states legislatures are stupid, I tell folks to move to a legal state. And if you do move, make sure that it's a state that's legalized recreational marijuana, because you may have trouble finding a good doctor, and self-medicating is a boon to your personal health. Arizona has a nice medical program, and I'm allowed to buy 5 ounces per month of buds, and concentrates that equals so much bud. Two and a half ounces every two weeks is the rule, but that runs to almost a thousand dollars per month! I'm doing well with vapes, patches, candy, and I love my buds, and I've been discovering the greatest strains that help pain and anxiety. Here's a little bit of abstract, I've still got my tonsils, and I have always coughed on marijuana. I was nicknamed "pussy-lungs" back in the day, and I tell folks in my videos that I don't necessarily enjoy the coughing from the weed, and after using a cigarette vape, Debbie & I both quit smoking, Deb's still clean, but after getting scribed weed, I was still sensitive in the throat, and I cough on air when I medicate. I warn folks, and I found that smoking a few menthol cigarettes per day, helps kill the throat rawing, and I have my wife hide the cigs, and she parcels out a few per day to get through my medicating sessions.

Now, I've rambled on long enough now, and I invite anyone to come and join a Facebook group of mine. Whether you are a pain patient, or just looking for a cure for any sickness, I've got a specific group for everything now. Cannabis Education For Everyone, and my vlog and blog do not require friending me. Those are for teaching the unknowing, and anti-weed Nazis, as I call them, spewing propaganda, and there are groups out there like "Christians Against Drugs," who literally lie outright about cannabis use, and they use scare tactics to make folks believe that smoking weed kills: things like..."thousands of teenagers die from injecting 'dabs' into their EYES, every day!" Bullshit! Nobody's ever died as a result of smoking weed, and "dabs" are cannabis concentrates that aren't injected into anything! Lies and propaganda that pisses me off, and I've been creating all of my pages for the express purpose of putting to rest all the lies and scare campaigns. Cannabinoids, the exogenous, or phytocannabinoids are the plants constituents that start out as acids, like THCA, CBDA, CBCA, CBGA, etc. And, once ingested, these lose their acid forms, and our endogenous system uses the THC, CBD, CBC, CBG, etc. These are simple, and basic hydrocarbons that fit our ECS's like a puzzle piece that completes a picture, or like a lock and key that opens up the body's ECS to promote homeostasis at every level of biological life! Simple hydrocarbons attach to our immune systems and promotes healing naturally. These are the safest substances we could ever use for our health care!

CBD, cannabidiol, is in marijuana in small amounts, and it's actually anti-high, as it offsets the actions of the THC, and reduces the euphoria felt by THC. Yet, THC has more uses than just a buzz! THC breaks down to THCV, Delta-8, and Delta-9 THC, Delta-9 produces the high, while the rest of the THC's perform many more functions in our systems. So, high CBD strains are less psychoactive, and are described as uplifting, and opens up folks' artistic talents. 

Poetry For Everyone on Facebook is my poetry, and whoever wants to stop by and post a poem. But, 98% of the poetry is mine. I mentioned the seven months of a single flare... and during that time, I created the poetry group and started writing poems after not writing anything since high school, and in 18 months time, I wrote more than 700 poems, almost all dealing with chronic pain issues and PTSD, and medical marijuana too. Pain, the great motivator! Yet, since I've gotten the extra morphine tab daily,  I've kinda written out my pains, and haven't rhymed anything in months. So, I'm resharing all of my works until I can write again.

CBD again... I have a friend who sells the totally legal CBD products from the hemp plant that are available in all 50 states through the mail! Debbie & I both take this Chaga mushroom blend with 10mg CBD caps, and after feeling bad for 18 months herself; my wife's friend back east got ovarian cancer, and I recommended my friends CBD products, and she got through chemotherapy, and amazed her doctors! So my wife looked up the mushroom blend and decided to try it... 4 days! After four days of the Chaga mushroom blend with 10mg CBD caps turned her it to a hemp-believer! So, friend with cancer, cured, wife after 18 months of crappy feeling and no real diagnosis, and whatever she had disappeared in 4 days! I'm now adding hemp oil to my bedside pharmacy as well as the mushroom powder, and I feel great! Still in the 4/5 range pain-wise, but I handle it better now.

So, I'm creaking and grinding bone on bone in my spine, and neck, and gotta stop for the night, but I think I've given everyone something to think about. Meet me on Facebook and see if ya wanna join a medical marijuana group, all members must be on my friend's list though, non-negotiable rules, sorry! Cannabis Education For Everyone is open to anyone to join, all other groups require friending me first. 

So, in closing; another little story... back in early January, the Dr. ordered a full blood panel, and I had Hep-C! Well, told the doc I'd smoke more, and when I went for a retest for the genotype, no hepatitis in my system! Cured by cannabis! When I started medical marijuana, I had asthma and chronic bronchitis, relied on an Albuterol inhaler, but within six months, I forgot about the inhaler! Cannabis fixed my lungs! Now; and since the Hep-c scare, Doc Rick did the first ever C-T scan of my lower lungs and found emphysema! I'm not smoking less, I believe that it's been there years, as a cigarette smoker, and I'm positive that I'll kick that too. Cannabis has been a literal lifesaver!

Cannabis and cannabinoids are the safest substances we could ever use for health care, and just the fact that hemp-based CBD stops seizures dead in their tracks should make everyone realize that those who don't use weed, and get sick... it can be traced directly to the human Endo-cannabinoid Deficiency! We require cannabinoids for life, why else do our bodies make them in response to illness!? Free marijuana from the prison of ignorance! 

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