So I love smoking pot. I just started smoking about five months ago and wow. Let me just say that I was blown away. I questioned why I hadn't been doing this all along. It got to a point where I was doing a wake-and bake whenever possible and inviting friends over to get high very frequently. I enjoyed every minute of smoking and being high. The only down side I saw was that I was picking up weight due to munchies.
Then I started going back to church. I started to hang out more with people from the church. I didn't hide my smoking. It was a part of who I was. Many of my friends told me it was wrong to smoke pot as a Christian, for the Bible says to be sober in every sense. My combat to that was that the Bible also said that the trees and stuff belong to us and weed is a natural substance from the Earth that God has provided.
As I got to read the Bible more and more, the guilt really started to set in. I saw that according to the word, my sins will be on display at the time of judgement. As a Christian, we are taught to lead by example. Was I leading a good example life to kids who saw me getting high (even though I was in my car with windows rolled up)? Would I really want EVERYONE to know I smoke pot?
So then I gave the rest of my weed away and decided I was done. No more. Maybe God was calling me to give it up I thought.
Then I got sick. Really sick. I had to have surgery to have my appendix removed and I got diagnosed with a disease that could end my life. At that time, my faith was called into question and I told myself that it was okay if I smoked because it was for medicinal purposes. But even that brought along with it a dose of guilt because, as a Christian, we are taught that God is our healer. And I was not relying on God to heal me.
Eventually I got to the point where I am now. Now I realize that my main reasons for getting high are just: lack of other things to do, boredom, or to avoid feeling how I feel, whether that be physical or emotional.
I don't know if smoking weed can ever be a harmless hobby. I realize that having a sober mind is important because trying to read the Bible while high is pretty much impossible (trust me, I've tried).
Some Christians I know who smoke pot tell me that it doesn't affect their relationship with God. And honestly I thought the same thing too until I tried to read the word high or try to hear what God is saying to me while high.
To this day, I still don't know whether to classify the lovely Mary Jane in my life as a hobby or an addiction but to be honest, it's feeling more like an addiction. I rely on it so I don't have to think or feel. I rely on it for comfort.
I've decided to do a week sober and go from there to see how I feel. I will be writing about that experience at the end of the week mark, which will be Monday.
Stay tuned and thanks for reading!